And Now It All Comes to a Head

Wow wow wow. Less than two weeks until the end of semester review.

I’ve been spending the last two weeks working my tail off on getting the quilt pieced together, the videos edited, the portraits finalized, and the razor blades printed. And I’m still going, still have a lot to do, and even thought I’m so incredibly tired, I’m excited about my work and to see where it goes from here.

Now I just have to figure out my artist statement. One of the critiques I got from my artist statement last semester was that there was a disconnect. My statement was filled with facts and stats, but my work was deeply personal. So, time for some writing exercises I learned many moons ago.

15 WORDS OR PHRASES THAT DESCRIBE YOUR WORK

  1. childhood sexual abuse
  2. trauma
  3. personal
  4. history
  5. obsession
  6. hoarding
  7. control
  8. multi-faceted
  9. complex
  10. difficult
  11. overwhelming
  12. affect
  13. symbols and clues
  14. self-portrait
  15. detailed

Now that I’m a little warmed up… Let’s try this artist statement thing.

“I was sixteen years old when I told someone. I was lying in bed with someone I loved, curled up in the fetal position, sobbing. I couldn’t breathe, it felt like I had swallowed lead, that my lungs were filled with needles. The thought that I had pushed down for nearly a decade was in my throat, hot and sharp, crushing my vocal cords. I could keep denying the truth, keep that secret locked away in the chest I imagined in my head, but I couldn’t. Not anymore. The words escaped my mouth.

I was molested when I was seven years old.

It has been approximately 5,703 days and counting since the trauma. I know I probably lost some days, like how I lost myself as a result of the PTSD. I am always on guard; after all, there are 1147 registered sex offenders within a five mile radius of where I grew up. I know I’m not the only one to carry such a burden, as 1 in 10 children will be abused before the age of 17. With a statistic like that, it’s understandable that childhood sexual abuse is a topic that is multi-faceted. There are many emotions, reactions, and connections to this topic. It is far from being one-dimensional.

My work attempts to cover the complexities of childhood sexual abuse, with photography as its main vehicle. ”

And I’m stuck. And it’s morning. I need coffee.

 

 

 

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